{"id":43206,"date":"2023-09-23T06:52:28","date_gmt":"2023-09-23T06:52:28","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/polarization.wpengine.com\/?p=43206"},"modified":"2023-10-10T17:52:40","modified_gmt":"2023-10-10T17:52:40","slug":"day-5-3","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/buildersmovement.org\/pdc\/week-3\/day-5\/","title":{"rendered":"Day 5"},"content":{"rendered":"\n\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\tBack To Exercises\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t
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\n Week 3<\/span>\n Cross The Divide<\/span>\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n
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\n Day 5 <\/div>\n <\/div>\n
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Adapt to Setbacks<\/h1>\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n\n \n\t

The key here is to expect and learn from setbacks and how to take a long view of planning informed by the best research on effective decision-making in complex, unpredictable environments.<\/p>\n\t

\n \n Today's Inspiring Playlist\n <\/span>\n \n Listen On Spotify\n <\/a>\n <\/div>\n
\n Share today's exercises<\/span>\n \n \"Twitter\n <\/a>\n\n \n \"Facebook\n <\/a>\n\n \n \"linkedIn\n <\/a>\n <\/div>\n \n \n\t

Exercises<\/strong><\/p>\n

\n\t\tChoose Your Lift Level\n\t<\/h2>\n\t

What do you have capacity for today? Whether it’s a light lift, or something a little heavier, taking a step is what counts.<\/p>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t5 minutes\n\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t30 minutes\n\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t30 minutes\n\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t\t\t5 minutes\n

Have Some Fun With Unintended Consequences<\/h3>

Watch and discuss these two short videos (video 1<\/a> and video 2<\/a>) with your political partner on unintended consequences. Then, discuss what this might mean for how you have been approaching conflicts in your relationship.<\/p>\n

The Science Behind It<\/h4>

Today, most Americans who try to reach out and speak with people on the other side of our current political divide often leave feeling even more frustrated and alienated than they did before the conversation. This is largely due to unmet expectations – if we can sit down and reason with them, we can find ways to agree on the issues that divide us (essentially by showing them how they are misinformed!). But these effects rarely happen. Changes in rapport and trust in these relationships take time and will experience setbacks. The sooner we can come to terms with this, the more likely we will take such setbacks less seriously and persevere.<\/p>\n\t\t\t\t30 minutes\n

Learn From Past Setbacks<\/h3>

It is natural for setbacks to happen. Give some thought to past setbacks in this or other relationships and how you navigated through them more effectively.<\/p>\n

Reflect on a past relationship (of yours or between others in your life) that felt stuck at some point but then moved on successfully. Recall the roadmap of this journey. Were there things you thought would help that didn’t (e.g., direct contact or confrontation) and things that helped that you didn’t think would at the time (others intervening, time, unexpected crises, etc.)? Try to make connections between 1) the fact that change can happen, even when it feels impossible, and 2) sometimes, it’s hard to predict what will push you forward and what will be a setback. Remember that it is okay to have setbacks.<\/p>\n

The Science Behind It<\/h4>

All mediators are taught that once disputants reach an agreement and feel satisfied with their outcomes, they should ask them to agree to return to mediation should the agreement collapse. Life and relationships are complicated and constantly in flux; what seems like a reasonable arrangement now may not still appear so in six months. Agreeing to return to discuss the issue helps disputants implicitly acknowledge that setbacks happen and gives them some recourse other than re-escalating the conflict after a setback occurs.<\/p>\n\t\t\t\t30 minutes\n

Take Multiple Actions<\/h3>

Put multiple eggs in many baskets. Jot down a few of the main forces pulling you and your political partner apart, and brainstorm what you might try to tackle together.<\/p>\n

The Science Behind It<\/h4>

Research<\/a> on effective decision-making in challenging situations has taught us that trying to effect change in multiple ways, rather than one way, increases your chances of success. When relationships are pulled apart by a constellation of factors that pits us against one another, it is often necessary to address various forces simultaneously to make a difference. Of course, you will need to pay close attention to what seems to help if you want to sustain progress – but when intervening in complex problems, more is more.<\/p>\n\t\t\t\t\"icon-reflection\"\n

\n\t\tDaily Reflection\n\t<\/h2>\n\t

End the week by connecting the dots. How have the five experiences you had this week affected this relationship?<\/p>\n

\n\t\tSet a daily reminder\n\t<\/h2>\n\t

Get daily exercise reminders on your phone or email throughout The Challenge to stay on track.<\/p>\n

    \t\n
  • Better navigate politically polarizing situations<\/li>\n\n
  • Repair strained relationships with family and friends<\/li>\n\n
  • Become a less reactive and more effective communicator<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\t

    By submitting your cell phone number, you are agreeing to receive periodic text messages from Starts With Us. Message and data rates may apply. Text HELP for more information. Text STOP to stop receiving messages.<\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    Back To Exercises The key here is to expect and learn from setbacks and how to take a long view of planning informed by the best research on effective decision-making in complex, unpredictable environments. Exercises Choose Your Lift Level What do you have capacity for today? 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